Caribbean Coast, Colombia: A La Orden

I’m posting this on Corrugated City and Colchaguino as I haven’t updated either for a long while, just to prove that I am still alive.

I’ve just got back from Colombia.

Over the past few years, I’ve travelled quite a lot- England, France, the US, Argentina several times…but I haven’t had what I call a real holiday- relaxing, doing nothing or doing something or doing both at the same time- since going to Brazil 5 years ago. After the stress of the earthquake in February, seeing all the destruction and nightmare living situations for a lot of people (and setting up a charity to help the worst affected in Colchagua has been even more stressful than the actual event itself), finding myself living on my own with 4 animals and trying to get through this colder than normal Winter, I really, really, really needed a break.

So 3 weeks ago, I just Googled ‘beaches, Colombia’ and ended up buying a ticket to Santa Marta, without really knowing what I was letting myself in for.

To get the negative part out of the way first, Santa Marta is only ok. It’s nothing really special. The beach is pretty crappy. There’s not much to the town apart from a small (but pretty and well-preserved) Centro Historico.

And that’s the negative done.

On the positive side, Colombia is absolutely awesome. I think speaking Spanish completely changed my experience. Last time I travelled around, almost 7 years ago, my Spanish was basic and everything was a bit of a struggle. I’d walk past a couple of girls in the street and hear this…

“Gjhmsou gringo blahrio smurpado gringo mupppsharekhou skewehah hahahahahahaha”

…and my brain would translate it all to:

“Oooh, look, a gringo, I’m going to call my brother around the corner and get him to mug the stupid gringo, beat him half to death and steal his kidneys hahahahahaha.”

This would make me feel uncomfortable.

But this time, I was able to understand what people were saying. And it turns out that what almost everyone was really saying was:

“Oooh, look at the gringo. He’s gorgeous. I don’t think I’ve ever seen a finer looking human being. That’s one hell of a good-looking gringo. I want to take him home and make him tomate de arbol juice until he just explodes with happiness. Hahahahahahaha”

This made me a little uncomfortable too- I’m quite humble - but uncomfortable in a happy way. And I do love tomate de arbol juice.

Also, speaking Spanish enabled me to pick out words and phrases particular to Colombia. That was impossible a few years ago- it was all just new vocab to me, I couldn’t tell the difference between accents or local dialects. Having lived in Argentina, Ecuador and Chile, I now can.

Colombian Spanish is lovely, particularly in the north, along the coast where the accent is kind of laid back. Vowel sounds are elongated and 'Js' are semi-optional. Trabaaa'o, vieeee'o. Watch a Colombian or Venezuelan telenovela and you'll notice.

I also really enjoyed hearing ‘A la orden’ all the time, meaning “What would you like?”, “How can I help?” or “You’re welcome”, depending on context. It seemed formal, but friendly at the same time.

Other little words that spring to mind…the weather in Santa Marta was ‘sabroso” (tasty) and everything else in the world is either ‘chevere’ (cool) or ‘tenaz’ (bad, but also good depending on context. Kind of like saying ‘fierce’, if anyone uses that word anymore. Do they? I don’t really know, I've lived too long away from the English speaking world.)

And finally, contrary to what I’d been told repeatedly- that this word is only used in Spain- Colombians love to ‘coger’ public transport and various other things. Childish fun. Yey!

Anyway, after just a night in Santa Marta, I moved 15 minutes away to Taganga, a backpackers haven in a tiny fishing village. Again, the beach there isn’t really all that great but I enjoyed my stay in Taganga. I found a private room for about us$10, met some nice foreigners, drank a lot of beer, ate a lot of fried fish, drank a lot of mango and tomate de arbol juice and had fun chatting to the natives too.

Set lunch for about us$6:

Ahhh, the natives. Really friendly, really gorgeous and really approachable. If you’re single, I would suggest that Colombia is the place to be, for both boys and girls. Of course, I was only interested in talking- pure political insight is what I was after.

I also spent a day and a night in Parque Tayrona, a national park with pristine beaches about a 60 minute boat ride away. The trip was a bit rough and, as I woke up late and got on last, I had to sit right at the front of the boat. When we started hitting waves, I got slung about a fair bit and ended up with a monster bruise on my thigh (look away now if you don’t want to see my bruised thigh).

And the boat ride that caused it:

But it was worth it. I only went to the main beach as I was feeling lazy, but that was gorgeous. You can sleep in hammocks there or hire a tent (I did the tent). It was a fun day or so.

Hammock tower:

Beaches:

Cost-wise, for tourism, Colombia is probably about 10-20% cheaper than Chile. Both food and accommodation are this much less. But, as with anywhere, you can spend as much or as little as you like. Having had my trip back to England in March cancelled last minute because of the earthquake, I had some cash to spare and didn't really skimp on anything. I only had 10 days or so, so spending a bit more here and there wasn't going to make much difference.

And safety and security- both Santa Marta and Taganga are really safe. Police everywhere, friendly locals who never gave me the impression I was getting ripped off for anything. It was really nice to be able to relax.

The funny thing was, before I booked the trip, I was convinced that all I wanted to do was lie on a beach on my own, doing absolutely nothing. I spent several weeks doing just that in South-East Asia about 10 years ago and loved it. That was my plan for the whole 11 day trip. But it turns out that I get all the alone time I need in Colchagua, and after a couple of days, I was a-hankering for some stuff. Like people, noise, museums and bars. Particularly bars. So I changed my ticket and headed to Bogota for 4 days. A good decision as it turned out…

Renaca Beach: Tsunami Debris

A couple of weekends ago I took the dogs for a walk along the beach in Renaca. The beach there is usually pretty clean with little drift wood or rubbish- it must be something to do with the geography of the bay...

This time, however, the beach was covered in debris...and it was sadly clear why. The tsunami that destroyed towns and villages along the coast in the 6th and 7th Regions was depositing what it had taken from them on beaches up and down the length of the country- pieces of people's homes, children's toys and whatever else floats...

Obtaining Residency in Chile: The Intelligent Way

1. Talk to Francisco Agurto so he can tell you exactly what paperwork you need for your type of visa.

2. Get all the paperwork together and meet with Francisco somewhere nice, like Starbucks.

3. Hand the paperwork to Francisco.

4. Forget about things for 3 weeks and then...

5. ...your 'Visa en Tramite' will arrive in the post.

6. Depending on your visa type, wait 6-8 weeks and then start checking Extranjeria once a week to see whether your visa has been processed.

7. When the visa is ready, phone Francisco and arrange to meet him at 8.50am on any work day in Extranjeria. He'll be waiting with a number which he picked up at 8am.

8. 9am, have your visa stamped in your passport.

9. 9.05am, register your visa with Policia International (in the same building).

10. 9.10am, go to Registro Civil to order your Cedula de Identidad.

11. Pay Francisco 60-80,000 Pesos, depending on your visa type.

12. Laugh at everyone else who could afford to pay 80,000 Pesos but thought it'd be more fun to sit in Extranjeria for hours upon end, have their applications rejected due to missing (or not) paperwork forcing them to return to wait even more time.

Get in touch if you want Francisco's number (email address here). He'll save you hours, if not days, of your time, you won't make any mistakes and you'll get your visa quicker as well.

I now have my Residencia Definitiva. Time taken? 4 months and only 15 minutes total in Extranjeria. Actually, the visa was ready in less than 3 months- I just didn't check because Residencia Definitiva usually takes 9...

Yesterday was quite a good Chile day. By 9.45 am I had my permanent residency and a real bank account, complete with cheque book, credit card, debit card and possibility of getting a mortgage. To anyone outside of Chile, this may not seem like much but, trust me, it's a pretty big deal!

Why Being An Ethical Consumer Is Bad...

Nothing to do with Valparaiso, Chile or the earthquake...but this is really quite funny:

Being ethical will turn you into a lying, cheating thief.

Who knew?

Further Earthquake News...

...can be found over on Colchaguino.

Earthquake in Santa Cruz, Chile

Well, Valparaiso wasn't too badly affected, certainly not compared to other parts of the country. That's not to say it didn't suffer, because it did. Just that the quake wasn't as strong and the city got back to normal with water and electricity a lot quicker than further south.

Here's my account and some photos of what happened during and after the earthquake in Santa Cruz, Chile. For more information and photos of what is happening in Santa Cruz, please visit www.colchaguino.com

I'm sure that everyone knows what happened by now so I won't go into a huge amount of minute detail. The earthquake has hit Santa Cruz really very hard. My guesstimate is that 80-90% of the adobe structures- houses, churches, government buildings, shops- in the area have either collapsed or will need to be condemned. So much of what makes the Colchagua Valley beautiful has been lost, along with so much history. It's so sad to see.

Not only have many people lost their lives but the earthquake will have a huge impact on everyone who has survived. The worst hit are the poor, as usual. Many now have no home and no prospect of work this year: the vineyards and fruit orchards have lost stock and much of the coming fruit harvest is now lying on the ground, rotting (the grapes survived pretty much unscathed, though).

But through all of this, the people of Santa Cruz have shown the most extraordinary attitude. We've seen none of the looting or trouble that has scarred other affected areas. Things have been orderly and calm. The clean up started immediately and by Sunday morning the streets were clean and passable and the petrol stations were rotating a generator between them, ensuring that fuel supplies remained in place. It has been fantastic to see this town and the community pull together.

When the quake hit at 3.34, I didn't quite know what to do. I tried to stand up but was thrown back into bed. So I just sat there, assuming it would end soon and assuming it couldn't get any stronger. But it didn't and it did. By the half way point, I was wondering how my house was still standing. And it still kept on coming. The only way I can describe it is that it was like being in a small boat in a big storm. It's quite unnerving when something as constant as solid ground becomes liquid.

To be quite honest, I really didn't feel scared. This is not me trying to be cool; it's just that I've never experienced a big earthquake before, just some strong-ish tremors, so I had nothing to reference it against. Afterwards, I knew it had been really powerful but it wasn't until the morning when I went out and spoke to my neighbours and saw the devastation wreaked that I started to comprehend what had happened. I asked one neighbour if it was worse than '85. He called out to his friend across the street and about 12 people shouted in unison, 'Si, po!'.

I cannot believe how lucky I have been. My house suffered barely a scratch. I didn't even lose a glass. The worst that happened was a shelf of tools fell on my car and left a dent in the wheel arch. So unimportant.

On Tuesday I went to Valpo to visit my house- all fine as well. The road there was a mess but was passable in most places, apart from a detour through Melipilla. Lago Rapel was badly hit, the road torn apart but by the time we came back on Wednesday afternoon, it was already well on its way to being fixed.

The response to the damage caused has been incredible in this part of the country. Things are getting back to as normal as they can be. It's really very impressive to see and it makes me proud to live here.

What the region- and the country- needs is for people to keep coming here as tourists or as investors. It's really important that people aren't put off visiting the country. Don't feel shy to come and tour the Colchagua Valley. You may think that it's not the right time, you may feel guilty but this is when we most need you to come.

Please come and stay in the hotels here, spend money and buy wine. Come and buy property- this is still a fantastic place in which to invest. This is not a marketing plan of mine, I'm not trying to take advantage of a terrible situation. I love the Colchagua Valley and I'm desperate to help the area rebuild itself. This is my home now and we need your help. Trade and investment will be the key to regenerating the region. If you are looking for a vineyard, fruit orchard or land for sale in Chile, please contact me via the link in the top right hand corner of this page.

Photos below:

In my house, all the wardrobes fell over. Sasha, my puppy, was trapped underneath. Thankfully, he's being crate trained and his cage, made by a guy here in Santa Cruz, survived the weight and the puppy got out ok.

The church on the Plaza de Armas was badly damaged and will need to be pulled down, I think.

The road leading onto the Plaza de Armas was seriously damaged. I imagine that the entire street will be demolished. A friend lived in one of these houses but thankfully came out alive. Her car- not so much.

This was the scene at 8.30, 5 hours after the earthquake struck.

By late afternoon on Saturday, the road had been pretty well cleared and by Sunday it was open to traffic. Very impressive.

The town centre was also badly hit.

Multihogar looked like it'd been ransacked.

The Imprenta Koqui didn't make it.

This house actually looked almost identical before the earthquake.

Bomberos- the aid distribution and registration centre. They've been doing a great job.

The Apalta Valley was badly affected as well...

...and wineries lost millions of litres of wine, causing the irrigation ditches to look this colour.

The road through Lago Rapel on Tuesday. By Wednesday afternoon, work crews had filled in most of the cracks and were busy preparing the tarmac.

I'll post more photos over the next day or two.

Earthquake in Chile

Just a quick post to say I'm ok after the earthquake. Currently in Valpo checking on things, all ok thankfully. Tomorrow I'm going back to Santa Cruz with a car full of supplies for those most affected- the city has been really badly hit and is still without electricity. We only got water back this morning, just before heading to Valpo. So far, Santa Cruz's residents have shown the most amazing attitude to what has happened and we haven't seen any disturbances or looting, just a collective will to make things better. It's why I love Santa Cruz.

Once we get electricity back in Santa Cruz, I'll post again with photos- we might not have power until the weekend though.

To anyone in Chile, please donate food and milk- the worst affected desperately need it in Santa Cruz, even more so further south.

And to anyone watching the news overseas, not all of the affected area is being looted by brain dead morons- the vast majority of the people here are doing their best to help everyone else. Please don't think that what you're seeing is representative of what's happening everywhere.

Chile, The Land Of Charm

This great video was sent to me by a friend. It's a 1937 Travel Talks programme all about 'Chile, the land of charm'. It's fascinating to see Vina, Valpo and Santiago in film from so long ago.

Expats in Chile

If you're looking for information about moving to Chile and interested in meeting fellow expats then you should take a look at the Expats in Chile networking group.

Ariell and Viviana run a great website that is full of information about living in Chile. They organise expat meet-ups and other events and connect foreigners living in towns and cities all over the country. The group already has over 800 members.

Theirs is a friendly and inclusive group- unlike a certain other chile forum, whose owner believes that slandering potential competition (and also potential business partners) and spreading absurd and baseless lies is an ethical and appropriate way to do business. I continue to shake my head in disbelief at his practices.

Anyway, enough of that: Go make some friends!

More renovations...but not in Valpo this time...

If you liked my posts about renovating my house in Valparaiso, you might be interested in seeing the job I did on my new house down in Santa Cruz in the beautiful Colchagua Valley. You might notice quite a few similarities in decor!

And if you're interested in buying a vineyard or fruit orchard in Chile or any kind of real estate in Chile, then you can see some fantastic properties over at www.chileinvestments.net Feel free to get in touch via the contact details on the right hand side.